I write so I can breathe. I am constantly evolving, mindless at times, frustrating even perhaps but heck, I wouldn't change the smell of freedom that comes with writing.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Hang in There

As kids we dream the most. The range is wide and we dream our most impossible dreams with an unwavering faith that remains unshaken. We fight battles that cannot be defeated as bravely as we walk places where the brave dare not go. We reach for the unreachable, tuck them under our arms, keep the moon beside our pillows as we drift away into slumber.

That's childhood. We play with shadows, think up and narrate stories believing them to be true. Even as we pass through those years, these dreams fade away slowly and more complex ones take its place. I often wonder why. Reality, perhaps, sets in. Knowledge increases and we get caught up in this real world's battles. With it, comes fear about so many things, times and situations.

So, what happens? We try to run to a more secure environment not realizing that shadows stay with us; shadows that effectively begin small and as time passes become longer as we see the sun set in our faith horizon. Suddenly we are aware of what was once a small patch of dark in the sunshine has turned into night. We turn, we pray, we hope to let the time pass by. The night lingers on trying to let the fear remain with us. In our darkest hour, we grope for something to hold on to, a reassurance that we shall not lose ourselves in those murky depths of our fears and despair.

In that darkest hour we perhaps remember that there is a God and we learn to pray. Really pray. Does not the darkest hour, like all others, last for sixty minutes?

Through the searing pain of our most anguished experiences is washed ashore a better and wiser human being. We do not reach the destination if we have not the will to walk that extra mile. Twinkling stars fade into dawn and the golden hue heralds a new day. Many miss the daybreak because we have slept away those precious hours. It is the person who has trudged the night away who finds the miracle just when the time is right.

However, if at the end of those dark hours you stay awake and find not the sun rising, how many stay on and persevere, knowing day still breaks because the dark clouds may have covered the horizon, hazed the vision, yet, undeniably, light pierces it all to emerge and guide our paths?

Pain is a tear that rips your heart, devastates your senses and releases from the deepest recesses of your soul a cry of agony, so primitive and unreal that it makes you want to die...and yet, and yet, courage can make it all seem worth the while. Pain is necessary to open our eyes to reality. Pain makes us value what we have and how best we can put to use what we have to become a better person, not in anybody's eyes but our own.

Hold conversations with yourself. There is a God within your soul who listens.

- Sandy


  1. it's something that rings an echo in my heart and mind... most of the time, i really want to see things clearly... plan ahead of time... look into the future... but God keeps changing my plans... perhaps, He has something better in store for me... today ;)...so i live for the moment... i feel pain... i am pain in the whole sense of it... but i wake up every morning, thanking God that i still breathe... i hope... and move forward... this time, i manage to smile ;)...thanks...beautiful post...

  2. Pain is nothing but our reaction to the non-fulfillment of our own expectations from the circumstances around us. It makes us a better person only in teaching us to be more patient, less complaining and more tolerant and that is bcoz we can't do anything else at that instance.. The eternal dilemma is to just wait or to do something? and more importantly for how long?...

  3. When we look at everything with the intensity of feelings, we also do need to realize that all intense feelings either brings out the best of us and the worst of us. It means, we have a choice. We can either use pain to bring out the best of us in all its positivity (yes, even pain has positivity and as empathetical as it can be), or we can destroy ourselves. Which is it to be? That's the choice we make. Every day. Every passing moment.
    @monug @melissa - thank you for sharing your thoughts! Hugs!