I write so I can breathe. I am constantly evolving, mindless at times, frustrating even perhaps but heck, I wouldn't change the smell of freedom that comes with writing.

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Love - Lessons from Life

The things we learn about love in life are endless. They seem unimportant until something happens to give the lesson due importance at a later stage in life or a second here and there from now. Who knows what? Who knows when? Who knows? Like they say, between the cup and the lip resides sometimes an entire lifetime or a split second.

It is possible to separate from the person you truly deeply love and still remain connected forever, that too, not by making an effort at trying to forget but by acknowledging that such love and depth of feelings do exist for the person concerned. Then, no matter where you go, you never stop loving. It will hurt, it will feel lonesome but it will bring a smile to your face as well.

A friend can turn into someone you love very much but to turn a lover into a friend never happens. It is utter stupidity. There is no reverse gear. Either it will be the friendship, romance, love, companionship of a lifetime or it will die. Those who believe there is a road back to simply friendship have got to be kidding themselves. It is a treacherous road and few survive. Plenty of grief there as well.

In matters of love it works out best when you give your all and not want anything in return. The grief is not there then. It is just an inner peace that comes with the realisation that you have the right to fall in love with someone but no right is ever given to you to expect the person to love you as much and in the same manner. I have been learning this all my life. If you master it, tell me and I will learn from you.

Breaking up always hurts. It’s something you have to snap out of. There is no weaning out really. You are either in or out. Subsequent to a break-up, you really discover the spiteful side of a person by the way you behave with the person you have broken up with. You also discover whether you are just as spiteful or not.

Love does mean having to say sorry, except, when you say so, mean it or don't say it at all. Love also means saying thank you. It does not mean you need to use just your vocal chords to do so. Use your heart! Yes, people do say there is no ‘sorry’ or ‘thank you’ in love and friendship. Yes. Trust me and don’t take such precious relationships for granted. There is a secure fact that you can take the person for granted. While that is a given, don’t abuse it.

Love has reason for making you do things that your mind will never begin to understand. Because, when you do something for the one you love, it is never an obligation. It is more of a wanting to do it and share the happiness it can bring to the other. It never is a second thought. Love can make you do things you have never imagined possible. These can be the stupidest of things and the most courageous of things...It eventually all boils down to wisdom of love or the lack of it.

Why am I talking about love...? Well, we all have theories about love...the above are what I have absorbed. My conformity to what has just been written may or may not be there and I do not choose to argue my own points or contradict. Every passing minute or second gives us an opportunity to re-write what we have written before, unlearn the learning and learn again. The lessons you learn are not the end all and be all of life...it is what IS that matter. Always!!


1 comment:

  1. You are so right, Sandy! We ladies live in a pipe dream- that love can mean friendship, and vice versa. I think the startling difference in our mindsets is responsible for many screwed-up relationships we see all around us. They are becoming more and more frequent..and the pattern remains the same always. Mismatch of expectations of what the individuals want out of their togetherness. And no amount of self-counselling or professional advice helps. One is lucky if the explosive link works!