I write so I can breathe. I am constantly evolving, mindless at times, frustrating even perhaps but heck, I wouldn't change the smell of freedom that comes with writing.

Thursday, April 19, 2012

What MEN Want

Over the years, I have had a great bunch of guy friends and girl friends who come and tell me how they feel about things, what they really want out of their woman or man. It doesn't make me an expert in managing my own relationships of course. Why? Oh well! Because, every person is different. All my life I have always always been asked by flabbergasted male friends..."Damn! I am really frustrated. Nothing I do is right. What is it that women really want? Beats me man!"

So, let's shift gears and move over to the question...what is it that men want? Yes, women. As much as we want men to automatically understand and know what we want, the men too feel the same. Right. This is the same planet we live in. So, I thought I'd get back to a few of my guy friends and check with them what is it that really puts them off. 

Women who want a guy out of desperation and not because they want want them is a turn off. A man likes to know he is wanted and desired as much as a woman does. It would do well to communicate. It takes a bit of courage but a man admires straight-forward honesty from women on that count. Tell the man you need him and want him as well. Socked the daylights out of you eh? Yup, it's true. As much as we would like to presume otherwise, men do need to spend time with you and they appreciate it as much when you tell them that you want to spend time with them. 

One really frustrated one said to me, heck Sandy, I can't stand the manipulation. I can't stand the unnecessary whose fault it is constant nag that happens. Why can't they get over a point? Apologies said, why cannot they move on? So I ask...What do you mean by manipulation? I needed to understand that better. I had a faint idea but it's better to ask than assume. So, I discovered, they hate to be pushed, with or without tears, cannot stand sentimental statements to take the relationship forward at a pace quicker. As much as women take their time, men want to take their time as well. The pushy men...oh well...exceptions are not who I talk about. Men just don't wanted to be nudged to take a relationship forward unless they are ready. Come to think of it, we, women, don't either. So, while we understand our pace and demand it and get it mostly, men too would like that same space and consideration. Is that so hard? Ummm...to each his own pace...or her.

Appreciate. Men like to be appreciated and acknowledged as much as women do. So, when a man gives you a compliment and you preeen and smile and skip a heartbeat or two and think about it way into the depth of the night, give the man something to think and smile about as well. As simple as that. Only, be genuine. Mean it. What is fake is very visible, no matter how well you try to cover it...it is far more obvious than you think it is. Acknowledge each other.

Taking a lesson from Gung Ho, if you want a relationship to work and be successful, give it the importance and attention it deserves...and watch it go places! 

Not over yet...more later on what men want...


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